The Female Rules
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The Female Rules :
- The Female always makes THE RULES.
- THE RULES are subject to change without notice.
- No Male can possibly know all THE RULES.
- If the Female suspects the Male knows all THE RULES, she must immediately change some of THE RULES.
- The Female is never wrong.
- If it appears the Female is wrong, it is because of a flagrant misunderstanding caused by something the Male did or said wrong.
- If Rule #6 applies, the Male must apologize immediately for causing the misunderstanding.
- The Female can change her mind at any time.
- The Male must never change his mind without the express written consent of The Female.
- The Female has every right to be angry or upset at any time.
- The Male must remain calm at all times, unless the Female wants him to be angry or upset.
- The Female must, under no circumstances, let the Male know whether she wants him to be angry or upset.
- The Male is expected to read the mind of the Female at all times.
- At all times, what is important is what the Female meant, not what she said.
- If the Male doesn't abide by THE RULES, it is because he can't take the heat, lacks backbone, and is a wimp.
- If the Female has PMS, all THE RULES are null and void and the Male must cater to her every whim.
- If the Male, at any time, believes he is right, he must refer to Rule #5.