20 golden rules for any office
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20 golden rules for any office :
- Rule 1. - The Boss is always right.
- Rule 2. - If the Boss is wrong, see rule 1.
- Those who work get more work. Others get pay, perks, and promotions.
- Ph.D. stands for "Pull Him Down". The more intelligent a person, the more hardworking a person, the more committed a person; the more number of persons are engaged in pulling that person down.
- If you are good, you will get all the work. If you are really good, you will get out of it.
- When the Bosses talk about improving productivity, they are never talking about themselves.
- It doesn't matter what you do, it only matters what you say you've done and what you are going to do.
- A pat on the back is only a few centimeters from a kick in the butt.
- Don't be irreplaceable. If you can't be replaced, you can't be promoted.
- The more crap you put up with, the more crap you are going to get.
- If at first you don't succeed, try again. Then quit. No use being a damn fool about it.
- When you don't know what to do, walk fast and look worried.
- Following the rules will not get the job done.
- If it weren't for the last minute, nothing would get done.
- Everything can be filed under "Miscellaneous".
- No matter how much you do, you never do enough.
- You can do any amount of work provided it isn't the work you are supposed to be doing.
- In order to get a promotion, you need not necessarily know your job.
- In order to get a promotion, you only need to pretend that you know your job.
- The last person that quit or was fired will be held responsible for everything that goes wrong.